The Truth

Man, I feel like a woman

Ladies, do you ever wake up some mornings, hair all tousled, teeth unbrushed, bare faced, makeup free, eyes still half shut, and you look in the mirror and say to yourself "Damn....I am one SEXY bytch!!! Not in a sarcastic or conceited way; I mean, you say it and you actually mean it?? Well Lord knows I don't!!!! I'm not even gonna lie!!!! In fact, I try to avoid mirrors at all costs until I've showered, lotioned my skin and run a brush through my hair AND teeth! I know we all like to give off the impression (especially to men!) that our beauty is effortless. However, let's face the facts: WE allllll require a little tweaking and maintenance every now and then! Whether we are glam girls or au natural femmes, none of us wake up looking like supermodels! (PS: If your man tells you that you do, HE'S GASSING YOU!! Don't be fooled!!)

So what I'm gonna discuss today are some of the things us, as females do to take us from "blah" to "banging" on a regular basis. Here's what makes us women feel like beautiful goddesses.

Fellas, pay attention!! It's not as effortless as you may think it is:

Personal Hygiene: Nothing makes us feel sexier than when we're wearing a fragrance that we know is amaaaazzzinnng! However, as my mother always used to say "you can't put perfume on a pig!" Which means, being sexy does not include going to the gym, running on the treadmill for 40 mins, doing an hour spin class, bench pressing for another 20 mins, sweating all up and down the place and then spraying on a little J-Lo Glow to cover the rank stench! Soap and water go a looooong way! Skipping showers is a no-no for so many reasons. Masking stinky body odour with thing like creams, deodorant and perfume are only temporary fixes. It will not rid your body of the stinkiness. What's worse, is that you will only end up smelling like a perfumed pig!! Nobody enjoys the smell of strawberry scented sweat! So do yourself a favour and jump in the shower! There is never ever a acceptable reason why a lady should smell putrid! Sorry...it HAD to be said!

Moving right along...I consider my shower my personal beautifying booth. So much can be done while your standing under the water, and this is exactly where a lot of beautifying takes place:


Exfoliating- As most of us should know, dry, ashy skin is NEVER in! The easiest way to prevent flakiness is by investing in both a pair of exfoliating gloves and a body scrub containing small, smooth microbeads. The result: Beautifully smooth, glistening, soft, silky skin all over! Sure it takes a little extra time and effort, but isn't that what being a sexy bytch is all about? :)

Exfoliation of the feet are also best performed in the shower. My weapon of choice is a pumice stone. This is the quickest way to remove any dry dead skin from your heels and around your toes. It's especially easy to remove when your feet or damp from the shower. Crusty feet are just gross -all year round!

*I strongly recommend body scrubs from The Body Shop. They're cheap, they smell amazing and they work like a charm! Gloves can be purchased everywhere from drugstores to grocery stores and are very inexpensive. Just be sure to wash them with detergent or replace them often to avoid bacteria build up. Not cute!*

Shaving-Ah yes! The dreaded act of hair removal. I can't stand it! Personally, I wish I could just walk around with my leg hair dragging on the ground, but unfortunately, I don't think to many people would find that very sexy! Ladies, we all know hair free bodies are the way to go. Although its a pain in the ass, and requires consistent maintenance, it's all worth it in the end. Now luckily, I'm not a hairy person at all! They only thing I actually do shave is my legs. Everything else is painfully waxed. And yes, in case you're wondering, that shyt hurts like hell!!! We'll get to that later...

TO BE CONTINUED....

Why I Blog...

I was having a conversation with my friend Suzannah the other day about blogs; Who's talking about what on their blog, who exposed who on his blog, who praised who on her blog...blog...blog...blog!! We came to the agreement that Toronto has gone blog crazy! Everyone thinks that their lives are important enough to keep on online window into their daily, weekly or monthly activities. This isn't necessarily a bad thing. Some might consider it somewhat egotistical, but I'm not judging. How can I? I guess I can almost be considered one of those people! However, my reasons for blogging are not for gossip purposes. I find no pleasure in exposing anyone's secrets, worshipping local Toronto "celebrities" or filling you in on my every movement. What satisfies me is sharing a little piece of my mind with all who are interested in reading what I have to blog about. I write about my life because I feel that it's relateable to many. I go through the same ups and downs as the average 22 year old person, both male and female. I have no interest in playing a role. I am me. This is me. This is not "Ashley-the-former-Toronto-model". I have no juicy gossip, I have no blacklists, I have no "What not to wear advice columns." I have my thoughts, my opinions, and my stories. I am not looking for fans (I have plenty as it is!! lol!! Just kidding...) I am not looking for approval. I am not looking for popularity. I just wanna write!! I just want you all to read with an open mind an no expectations.

That's all!!

xoxo

Ms. Taylor

I made a promise to u guys that I will try to make an effort to blog when I'm happy instead of just venting when I'm pissed!! SOoooooOOO...here I am, happy, and blogging. Only problem is, I don't quite know how to explain the way I'm feeling!! Let's just say the amount of wasted effort it takes to be angry and think negatively can be spent accepting things for what they are, without trying to tweak it, without trying to control it, just letting it be.




I'm in Love With You-Erykah Badu + Steven Marley

Another beautiful moment in history

How times have changed

This is a Norman Rockwell painting of Ruby Bridges ...



... the little black girl who had to be escorted to school by federal marshals. "On November 14, 1960, Bridges faced hostile crowds as the first black child to attend a previously all-white New Orleans school. She was 6 years old and had only been told by her mother that she was going to be attending a new school that day and 'had better behave.' Little did she know that she would be bombarded with jeers and even death threats, and that she would end up being the sole child in her first grade class after other children were kept home by their parents." All because Ruby was Black.

Forty-eight years later -- January 5, 2009 -- here is a picture of Sasha Obama, a little 7 year old Black girl, being escorted to school by her mother, First Lady-elect Michelle Obama, and the Secret Service because Sasha's daddy is now President-elect of the United States, Barack Obama...

Shame on me!!

They say misery loves company...and if u ask me, I couldn't agree more! Take me for example, when I'm in a pissy, messed up mood and I feel the whole world is one big piece of crap, what do I do? I take a few shots of hard liquor and start blogging my misery away. I literally type until my fingers feel like they're going to fall off! Even tho it might not seem like a lot of information to u guys, the speed at which I'm typing at is record breaking! Believe me!! Blogging is extremely therapeutic and is definitely my favourite stress reliever. However, when u look at the bigger picture, what I'm actually doing is sharing my sad, pathetic stories with all of u so that u all can feel like shyt as well!! I feel down so I bring all of u down with me!! How horrible!!! I sincerely apologize!!! From now on I promise to make a conscious effort to blog when I'm in my fantastic moods as well as my bad ones! If I'm gonna bring u down, I might as well bring u up with me as well!!

Stay tuned... (lol)

xoxoxo

.....topic-less!!

SOooo I decided to stay home tonight! I thought it would be fun to take a bubble bath, get tipsy, and play Guitar Hero in my boxers and tank top all night! Except I did it in the wrong order. I got tipsy, took a bubble bath, feel asleep in the tub and almost drowned, now I'm sitting in my room, wearing an over sized hoodie, blogging away on my laptop. Only problem is....I have nothing to talk about!! Shut up!! It happens to the best of us sometimes!

........I just ordered pizza. Large, extra cheese, hot peppers, pineapple, and chicken...

Heh...who doesn't love pizza right??....

OH HEY! Did u guys notice I added a music player to my blog?? Yup! I surrre did! Now u can jam to some of the songs I jam to while reading my super exciting blog posts! Cool huh?? No??....oh...well i thought it was kinda...cool....

Hmm......Ok...

So....I bought I new pair of jeans today!! From Ya Ya...at Scarborough Town...great store...Last week I went a little crazy there too...I bought a shitload of stuff I probably shouldn't have cuz...well...I forgot I had to start school again next week and...,yeah...

ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?!??!?!?!!??!?!?!?!

Me either.....I'm bored!! Shyt's depressing!! lol!!

I'll come back after I eat!! Maybe my lack of creativity is being caused my hunger pains.....

Ciao!!

xo

Lesson Learned

Sing it Miss Keys....

Leaving the past behind

I'm directing this particular post to both men and women, but specifically men. I have quite a bit of male readers who instead of leaving comments right here on my blog, will opt to hit me back with questions and feedback on my Facebook. That's completely fine with me! I'm just happy your reading! I appreciate all the love and support I get from you guys! Thanks very much!

Ok...

So here's what's on my mind:

You meet a girl, you dig her style, you hang out often, you grow close, eventually you get on a level with her where you can start asking her some personal questions. This is what will help you determine if she's compatible with you, right? So, you go ahead and ask her about her family, her friends, her educational background, her goals and ambitions for the future, how many guys she's slept with.....

Hmmmm....

If you're wondering why I stopped there, I'm gonna tell you why. YOU WENT TOO FUCKIN FAR WITH THAT ONE!!!! Conversation that involve an exchange of personal information become a LITTLE TOO personal when you start to get into your sexual history. My only question to you men out there is..."why the fak would you want to know how many guys your potential girl has been with anyway????"

Does it really matter?? And I mean, the fact that you're comfortable enough to ask her, shows means that chances are, you like her enough to be on that level where you think that you deserve to know that information. So does that mean that if she turns around and tells you she's been with 40 men, you're going to pack up your feelings and head for the door?? I just don't get it! The only people that ever needs to know that information is your doctor and the person that you choose to spend the rest of your life with. That's it!!

Now, I know what you're thinking. "But Ashley, if she has nothing to hide or be ashamed of, she shouldn't feel anyway about answering the question, right?" WRONG fuckers!!! There's this little messed up system you may be familiar with...it's called "society." The thing about society is that when a woman's number of sexual partners exceed the "socially acceptable" amount, (which apparently is no more than 1) she seems to be labled as a "whore" and pretty much gets thrown in the dumpsters. But when a man sleeps with any and everything that has nipples, and an area for him to stick himself into, HE GETS PRAISED!! YAAAAY!!! They damn near throw celebration parties in honor of their filthy behaviour. But it's alllll good...you know why?? CUZ THEY'RE MEN!!!

Here's where I'm going with this: When you put a woman on the spot by asking her how many men she's slept with, you're doing two things. a) you're setting yourself up for potential disappointment and b) you're changing the entire tone of the relationship.

And you know what else, whether or not homegirl is ashamed or proud of her numbers, there is a huge chance that she's going to lie to you!! That's right, she might lie! Just like you would lie to her if the roles were reversed. And she's probably not lying becuz she's embarrassed. She's lying cuz she knows that you have her on the chopping block. So she's sitting there, caught completely off guard, and your staring at her with a look on your face that says "You better not fuck this up bytch!" She knows that her answer can either make or break her. So the smartest thing to do, to prevent your insecure ass from running in the opposite direction, is give you a safe number..like...3!!! LOL!!

Now, I'm referring to MOST girls! Not me of course, becuz I am a virgin! True story...

To be honest with you, I have only been asked that question by 2 people, my doctor, and another guy. And for some stupid reason, I gave them both my honest answer. I really had no reason to lie to my doctor. But the guy, even though I felt he had some real nerve to be asking me if the first place...I told him! Whatev...

Of course that lead to him wanting to know more and more, but he's a guy. It's only expected.

Basically what I wanna know is, if you've already invested feelings into a girl, does it really matter how many guys she's slept with. Is it a reflection of insecurity if you feel like her number is "too high"? Would you feel embarrassed to be seen with a girl that the even the ticket seller at the movies has been with? Are you threatened that there's a possibility that she might have had a few men that were built like stallions and did things to her that you've never even heard of? What the hell is it?! Why do you neeeed to knoooooowwww??? Most women don't give a shyt how many partners you've had in your lifetime. We know you're all whores! So it's no big surprise if you have a history longer than the Dead Sea Scrolls.

One of the smartest things a guy ever said to me was this:

We were on our second date and we were talking VERY briefly about our past relationships. He turned to me and looked me in my eyes and said "Ashley, don't expect me to ask you details about your relationship history or anything to do with your past. I want to consider you my blank canvas. I'll draw up my own conclusions based on what I see from you with my own eyes."

GENIUS!!! Of course he turned out to be a complete physco but the point is, he made perfect sense!! I have never forgotten his words and it's safe to say, I live by them to this day.

Ok I'm done....well not really. There's so much more I can say but I'm gonna stop here.

At the end of the day, guys, if you want a pure little virgin girl then why don't you go down to the local high school and pluck one out of a grade 10 English class.

But for those of you who can handle a women, my advice to you is, leave the past behind. You don't always have to know everything, you nosy little shits!! lol!

Love you guys!!

UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I NOW UNDERSTAND 160% WHY WOMEN BECOME LESBIANS!!!!!!!!!!

MEN MAKE ME SICK!!! THEY ALL JUST NEED TO FALL IN A HOLE AND DIE....

FUCKIN LOSERS!!

Red Light District

Ok so...this is my first blog of the new year!! How exciting!! For some odd reason I feel obligated to make it good! I'm making a conscious effort not to man bash as much as I did in 2008. So instead, let's bytch bash!! I have a few things I need to get out there!

Question: Why are some females such dirty, shameless, no-moral-or-value-having whores?? I don't know if it's just my generation, but I am completely disgusted with a lot of girls between the ages of 18 and 23. Let me break it down...

I work with men...all men...all very handsome men. Becuz of the kind of person I am, they treat me like one of the boys, which means lucky little me gets to be a part of the uncensored conversations about girls, sex, etc etc. Although I've had to occasionally run from the office in utter disgust from a few of these conversations, I feel like I have learned quite a bit about the way men view women/girls. All I have to say is, I don't freakin blame them!

I'm not sure what it is that's lacking in a lot of these young females' lives, but whatever it is, it's causing them to have very little or no self respect. They lay on their backs for any and everyone that shoots them a look. It's sad. Half of them can't possibly anything more than the man's name before they are giving up their bodies to them. They put themselves in a category within the first 5 minutes of interaction. It's in the way they dress, the way the walk, the way they talk...it's their overall presentation that's screaming "FUCK ME!" TAKE IT ALL! I'M GOOD FOR IT! AND I EVEN PROMISE NOT TO ASK FOR YOUR NUMBER ONCE IT'S OVER 5 MINUTES FROM NOW!"

The first thing I can assume that's missing in the lives of these girls is a positive male figure. Yeah yeah, I know that sounds super cliche and Dr. Phil-ish but it happens! Dad splits...little girl grows up with a certain hartird for men that she probably doesn't even know she has...and ultimately this leads to her becoming a "pleaser". She learns to do whatever it takes to please men instead of finding out what it takes to please herself first. And I'm not just talking sexually. I mean her whole life becomes about making men happy. She feels obligated at all times to make sure any man she's with is content. Even if it means giving it up before she's ready. Why? Because of the fear of rejection. Emotionally, these girls are scarred from their fathers walking out on them, so the thought of any other man rejecting them in any way, shape or form, is too much for them to handle. This is just one example. There are countless scenarios resulting in countless reasons why girls these days are so promiscuous.

There's nothing wrong with a little friendly competition (unless it's among friends of course!) When two females are in a social setting, say, a party for instance, and there happens to be a guy that catches both girl's attention, naturally, the internal tigress will come out in each of them. Take for example, a female peacock who spreads her feathers to show of their beauty when a male peacock walks by. Except females these days are spreading their legs to show off their insecurities when a male walks by!! NOT CUTE LADIES! There are A LOT of other ways to lure a guy in without promising to sleep with him. Let's see...there's eye contact, body language, or HEY! How bout good old fashioned CONVERSATION!! WORDS!! Remember what those are?? Your mouth is capable of doing other things...like speaking!! Try it sometime!

Excuse my ignorance, but I'm sorry! I've had it with hoes!! I'm tired of the loose ones making the GOOD GIRLS look like shyt! It's getting harder and harder to find a good man because so many of them are distracted by all the free sex that's being thrown at their feet. That's not a justification by any means! In the end, if the man takes it, he's just as dirty as the chick...we know this. But really, we as girls know that men are weak when it comes to sex. Why not give them something to work for? Men get praised for being scandalous...once again...this is something we already know. But as women, we make one false move and our respect is out the window! Is that fair? Of course not! But that's the way of the world.

I'm not saying I'm perfect but one thing i do know is that my mother raised with me enough class and instilled enough morals in me that I can sit here today and express my concern on this topic. Step ya game up ladies! When u look bad, u make us all look bad! And if your mad at me right now for putting you on blast, you shud be ashamed of yourself cuz I'm probably directing this towards you!!!

So in conclusion, let 2009 be the year of cleaning up you reputations ladies!
If not for you, then at least for your mothers!!

HAVE SOME DAMN RESPECT FOR YOURSELVES!!!

*Storms off....*

lol!!

Goodnight!!!